The Benefits of Thrift Shopping

17 09 2012

Recently I took on a new writing client. I wrote two articles for them before they bothered to mention that “Oh yeah, you won’t get a byline and you can’t tell anyone you wrote these articles because they belong to us now.” Now, I don’t consider myself a vain person, but it’s kind of hard to build a portfolio when you’re writing under those constraints. It would have been nice to have that income, but I told them “No thanks” and parted ways with them. This is the second article I wrote for them, which  I withdrew from consideration.

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Batman Vs. Superman: The Definitive Superhero Debate

26 07 2012

The following post was originally an article on This or That, but was lost that one time they forgot to back up their server and it crashed and everything was terrible. In light of The Dark Knight Rises and the upcoming Superman reboot, I thought it would be a good time to revisit this issue.

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This or That or the Other Thing

2 02 2011

I’ve got a new freelance writing gig which I am quite excited about. I will be writing blog posts for This or That, which is a rather entertaining website. My first post is up here and I have a second one pending that will be even funnier.  So keep an eye on the site or follow me on Twitter and I will be tweeting links to the articles as they go up.

From the Rejection Pile: 10 Patriotic Songs for Kids

27 10 2010

I was on a roll with article rejections last week.  After having my “How to Surprise Your Girlfriend” rejected for not being serious enough, the same thing happened with this article.  I was told to remove the “sarcastic political stuff.”  Not gonna happen.  Instead I present it to you here with the sarcastic political stuff.

10 Patriotic Songs for Kids

By Jeremy Clymer Read the rest of this entry »

From the Rejection Pile: How to Surprise Your Girlfriend

20 10 2010

This article got sent back to me with the note that at least three out of the five items should be serious, and that I should definitely get rid of the bits about adopting a child and spray-painting a car.  NO DEAL.  I don’t compromise my artistic integrity.  So here it is, presented to you TOTALLY UNCENSORED.

How to Surprise Your Girlfriend

By Jeremy Clymer Read the rest of this entry »

From the Rejection Pile: How to Date in a Godly Way

8 06 2010

When I wrote this article, I knew full well that there was really no way it was going to be accepted by the site I wrote it for. I had to write it, though. Why? Because it’s funny.

How to Date in a Godly Way

In a society where kissing and hugging are openly tolerated on the streets and moving pictures show young couples making eye contact before marriage, many have forgotten how to date in a godly way.  Here are some tips for how to interact with the opposite sex without incurring the wrath of the Lord and damning yourself to an eternity of hellfire. Read the rest of this entry »

New Writing Gig

21 05 2010

I just wrote my first review for and I think it turned out pretty well.  It helps that I got to review an album that I actually liked (Sarah Jaffe’s Suburban Nature).  I got to check my snark at the door and praise an up-and-coming artist that deserves recognition.  Go ahead and read my review, and listen to the song that’s linked to at the end of it.  Hopefully you’ll like her, too.