A Very Eggy Halloween

29 10 2010

Hey, Halloween is this weekend.  What better way to celebrate it than with some scary stories?  As it turns out, I have a couple for you.  The first is an audio version of “The Old Ones,” courtesy of The ShadowCast Audio Anthology (though sadly now missing from their iTunes archive).  Then after that, enjoy “The Ghost Who Wouldn’t Stop Hitting on Me” over at Misfit Magazine.  Warning:  YOU WILL PISS YOUR PANTS.  That doesn’t have anything to do with the stories, though.  You’re just getting old and incontinent.


From the Rejection Pile: 10 Patriotic Songs for Kids

27 10 2010

I was on a roll with article rejections last week.  After having my “How to Surprise Your Girlfriend” rejected for not being serious enough, the same thing happened with this article.  I was told to remove the “sarcastic political stuff.”  Not gonna happen.  Instead I present it to you here with the sarcastic political stuff.

10 Patriotic Songs for Kids

By Jeremy Clymer Read the rest of this entry »

From the Rejection Pile: How to Surprise Your Girlfriend

20 10 2010

This article got sent back to me with the note that at least three out of the five items should be serious, and that I should definitely get rid of the bits about adopting a child and spray-painting a car.  NO DEAL.  I don’t compromise my artistic integrity.  So here it is, presented to you TOTALLY UNCENSORED.

How to Surprise Your Girlfriend

By Jeremy Clymer Read the rest of this entry »